boyfriend.
Thursday, August 26, 2010 at 1:58PM I haven't had a boyfriend for a while. It's been over four years. I've exclusively dated two guys at various times during those four years who, as it turns out, weren't exclusively dating me. Faithful concubine. That sucked.
Sometimes I wonder what it'd be like to have a boyfriend. The last one I had was Lorelai's dad. And that... well... it felt less like a relationship+more like... I don't know what.
ANYWAY.
I wonder what it'd be like to have a boyfriend. One that's like, "Hey. Wanna be my (only) girlfriend?"
I'm mostly ok being single. There's three instances where, everytime they come up, I yell in my head, "I WISH I HAD A BOYFRIEND!"
- When I have to bring the groceries in from my car. Even then, a boyfriend wouldn't be able to help unless he was around when I was bringing the groceries in.
- When I want ice cream late at night. This is a common occurrence. At least twice a week.
- When I want to cook something that I'm sure Lorelai wouldn't appreciate, but a sweetheart would. I cook for her plenty, but I just don't think she'll enjoy my fish tacos. Mostly cus the sauce I use is spicy. I bet a boyfriend would like them!
I mean. There's other times that a boyfriend would be cool. I'm sure you can imagine when. But those three bullet points above make me wish I had a beau every.single.time.
There's a few hurdles that I need to get over before I could be like, "Ok. I'm changing my Facebook status to In A Relationship." Some of them include:
- Lorelai. Can't have a boyfriend without my kid liking, NAY! Loving him. Also, family. My family is so dope. They need to accept him.
- Time. Space. Boundaries. He's got to respect them. I like alone time. I need it for a lot of reasons. Overshare of time/space/boundaries is not gonna work. I love being in good company, but need to be able to decompress or just chill solo.
- Humor. MUST. BE. FUNNY. And must get my humor. This is a big deal. Hot+unfunny is like being Hot+a whale. Like, wtf am I gonna do with that?!
- Trust. Blahblahblah. I don't have major trust issues, per se. I don't have higher trust expectations for a lover than I do anyone else. But I just want to feel good about things.
- etc. etc. etc.
There are some perks, I imagine, to being my sweetheart. Just cus the relationships with Lorelai's dad+my pseudo-boyfriends crashed+burned doesn't mean that I can't have a successful, happy, fulfilling coupledom with someone, right? Here's just a small fraction of why I'd rock as a girlfriend:
- I rock.
- I have my own sh*t.
- I like to build things.
- etc. etc. etc.
This isn't a personal ad or anything. I think I'm managing the single life ok. Sometimes people in relationships are just so bummed all the time. I don't want that. I just want someone that'll eat my tacos.
Reader Comments (6)
Hmmmm nice post. Real honest and introspective.
I reeeally want to make an eat your taco joke right now. But I wont because this post is so sweet. You, my dear, deserve all of that and so, so much more.
p.s. I'm about to build two beds, one for me and one for P. You wanna come over? I think there may be hinges involved. :) <3 U.
Adza: Oh I totally meant taco in all possible contexts. And YES! I want to help you build beds!!!
I liked this post. You have inspired me to write one of my own.
windowshop78.blogspot.com
buys ticket to the Goldie State
"Hot+unfunny is like being Hot+a whale. Like, wtf am I gonna do with that?!"
fuck the shit out of his whale dick then cut him loose. after you make him take your groceries from the car.